Finally, I’ve been wanting to go all in on this article for a WHILE.
First appeared on: Thought Catalog
Author: Anne Gus
WTF: Yes, you read that title correct. When I first saw this article tweeted out about 2 weeks ago I almost didn’t believe it was real either . Then I read it – mouth agape, trying my best to decide if this was a real thing. Then I went on to check out Anne’s other crazy ramblings and have deduced she’s merely a contributor featured to get people amped up in a discussion and viewing more TC pages. It has to be, there is no other rational explanation. Let’s just set aside the fact that she’s basically saying those who aren’t sexually promiscuous are also not true feminist, she’s also saying that they’re prudes, which in my opinion is the worse G-rated thing you could call another female in this day and age. She doesn’t even hide the fact that she feels immensely superior to women who claim to “want sex to mean something” she’s straight up bashing them for allowing their emotional needs to cloud their physical ones with no mercy. She also makes a pretty glaring stereotype of Asian girls that I won’t even touch here because there is so many other things to worry about with this girls sanity.
The Evidence: “Newsflash: This is the modern world, we are modern women. Modern women are sexually liberated. We are supposed to have as much sex as possible with as many strangers as we can, because we can!” [[ Nope, that’s not what sexually liberated means. Yes, we CAN do that but feminism is about empowerment and I can’t really see having lots of meaningless sex just because you have a vagina as empowering per say.]]
“[Aside to all girls]: OK, so I know like sometimes you get feelings for a boy after sex, but KEEP. THIS. UNDER. WRAPS—don’t let anyone know this, especially not white men; it makes feminists look bad.” [[This is the most contradicting statement I have ever read. Keep your feelings to yourself because expressing your emotions makes feminist look bad?! Are you fucking kidding me? This is just- #ICantEven]]
“Everyone knows that real, empowered women sleep around and don’t get attached, so why do you seem, like not even ashamed to not be comfortable with casual sex? Women are supposed to enjoy hook-up culture just as much as men—and we do—I swear.” [[At this point I just knew it was a joke. I knew it. No female thinks this. Even porn stars don’t think this. If you want to know what REAL sexually empowered women think about sex and intimacy check out the Showtime documentary Aroused and then get back to me. It’s really really good.]]
My Opinion: As much as I hate this article and the propaganda she’s spewing out all over it, there is a discussion to be had here. I think her assertion that women DO enjoy sex and are only pretending to be turned off by men with massive sex drives is, in fact, annoying. Women have sex drives that are equal to and sometimes rival mens and denying that fact to seem more “lady like” is doing a slight disservice to feminism. There isn’t anything wrong with being open about sex, desire and intimacy but we need to build environments where those types of discussions aren’t judged and women aren’t vilified or “slut shamed” for their own wants & needs. However, obviously I disagree entirely that women who are looking for meaning in sex are somehow bad examples of womanhood. You can have both. You can want sex and meaning, there isn’t anything wrong with that. In fact, I think all sex has meaning, I think where women often get it wrong is that it doesn’t always have the meaning you want it to have. Contrarily, I think men are pigeon hold into the idea that sex doesn’t mean anything to them, and that it’s just about putting their dick into the next pretty young thing, something which is short changing men and not allowing them to be vulnerable, multifaceted human beings with feelings and emotions all their own. This whole article is just a mess. A mess. Eww and she’s from Boston, way to play into the stereotype Anne. Gross.